I used to live in a small fishing village in Southeast Asia. Come summer and the monsoon, it would rain nonstop, from torrential downpours to light sheets of gossamer rain.
The family next door was Cantonese. They had a daughter about my age. It’s been a long time and my memories have faded a bit, but I still remember how cute she was. I would get butterflies in my stomach everytime I saw her.
We would often sit in front of the house and watch the rain together, talk about random things like what our lives would be like 50 years from now. Whenever she laughed at one of my jokes, I felt like the happiest man in the world.
Sometimes, when the power went out and the entire town was pitch black, we would sit close together while the thunderstorm was pouring. I can almost remember the way the warmth of her body felt.
As we got older, I would take her on bike rides along the backroad beside the beach whenever there was a full moon. She would sit in the back and grab tightly onto my back. Sometimes I would pretend to see something and brake suddenly so her whole body would lean into mine. It was a magical feeling that I haven’t been able to quite replicate.
Even being able to touch the girl you love is more exhilarating than sleeping with some random girl.
Woman are so different here. They all wear those giant sunglasses and text every minute. Everytime I see them, they have earplugs on or are texting on the phone. It’s different, and it’s worse.
Once I lived in the Kathmandu. Where I lived was close enough to the countryside that I could enjoy the city and the village. I remember the days when I would ride my bike forever. The wheels would rush across the lush grass, and sometimes I’d imagine her body pressing into mine again. Eventually, I would ride so far away that all I could see was green. It rained often in the spring so the fields would be scattered with muddy pits. Goats would trot out and chew into the earth. The scene I have in my head seems like another world. I wish I could ride my bike back to that place.
Even though I get to drive around in a car now and live in a house that’s not leaking everytime it rains, there’s this empty feeling. I just can’t get into the party, get drunk, and fuck. Here are these kids drinking their mind away while walking around making cool poses for the camera. Girls just throw themselves away and give head to some random stranger. Sex is easier, but it doesn’t mean much at all when you’re fucking them with a condom.
I was backpacking through Thailand. The guy just married and lived in a small village in the middle of nowhere, working as an electrician. The girl cooked up some vegetable soup for dinner and pork stew with steamed white rice.
The two just sat and ate dinner in silence. The house was small and I could hear rain pattering on the the metal roof.
I sat in front of the house sipping some hot tea, and wondering to myself how different this kind of life is.
2 Comments
I’ve lived in cities all my life. Whats worse then the apparent need for girls to do anything for anyone if they have enough booze in their hands is the idea that circulate the “boys” of our species that the more “girl friends” you can possibly attain in x amount of years equate to the pinnacle of human achievement, never once thinking that 2 people who understand love together is better then ten thousand who pretend.
. . .okayyyyy. . .